Quick and easy Supper

Well i don't know about you, but you get your off days when everything does not always go according to plan, traffic is tighter than usual, you overslept, your boss was grumpy, your husband had  a long day and your little tornado's ( i know my son is like that) is for the first time in history so hungry he can start chewing his shoes!

The last thing you want to do is spend an hour behind the stove, having the whole family nagging for supper!

So here is a short cut and short timed menu idea for those nights!

Spaghetti Bolognaise, with a toss salad and a garlic bread!

What you need:
Mince
Spaghetti
1x packet of spaghetti bolognaise mix ( knorr)
1 garlic loaf
and your salad ingredients

While you cook your spaghetti, stick the garlic loaf in the oven, and put your mince in another pot.
right let them start so long while you make the salad, once your salad is done, drain the spaghetti and ad your spaghetti mix with some water into your mince pot, let it go for about 2minutes, and add it to your spaghetti, take out your garlic loaf and woala! supper ready in less than 40 minutes!

Enjoy!
xx

GETTING THE LOOK FOR LESS!

We all want to look Good right? Who said that becoming a mom should mean sweatpants and oversized t-shirts?

Now this look could defnitly cost a fortune, but if you are not too brand concious, this look can be pulled of on a tight budget!

Similiar earings can be bought at Mr. Price for R49.99
The sunglasses can be bought at Checkers Bondi Blues for only R89.99
Similiar Top at Edgars at R199.00
A similiar Jacket at your local chinese Clothing shop for only R160.00
Similiar Sandals At Pick 'n Pay Clothing for about R130
The Bag at Jet for about R89.00
and the Jean you can get at Mr. Prices for about R150

Now some of the Prices may vary depending on where you shop, some places could be cheaper, others a bit more pricy, but all together this is an outfit that you can mix and match for under R1000.

Happy outfit hunting!

xx

Never, Ever , Ever , Ever and i mean never cheat on your Hairdresser!

Okay so let me begin by just defending myself with this....For the past 2 months i have been so busy, early early mornings, late late nights, we were busy with a huge marketing campaign in cape town and i had little time for myself! Now Saturday We were invited to a birthday Party of a friend's brother, Now let me start by saying my hair is not the easiest of hair because i have to straighten, and blow and straighten again before i can go out in public, and when i wake up in the mornings i always say thanks first that my husband has stuck with me this long because my hair curls up like a bad perm!! And i could only get an appointment with my hairdresser for this Wednesday, so i popped into a Local salon, and asked if i could just have a little trim on them split ends...and this is what happened: I Got there and waited 10 minutes to be taken into a little room that looks like a dungeon ( could be me just feeling paranoid of the unknown) they washed my hair and i was looking forward to being treated to that nice scalp massage that they do when they wash your hair, but instead i got cold water and a woman who was obviously angry at her husband because she washed my head V I G U R OU S L Y!!! damn man my scalp was on fire, but i still had an incling of hope that there was still a massage...rinse...cold water again...dripping down my spine....aaaahhhh here it comes, here it comes....BOOM over WTH? I go over to the seat of death in front of the mirror and my hairdresser with her glassy eyes says, so what will we be doing today? " oh just a little of the split ends and thin it out a little, because i do have an appointment for Wednesday...gulp... she picks up the scissors and i get a flash back of that Edward scissor hands movie, and i tell her that my hair is worse that a poodles when it is dry, no no it's fine don't worry about it, but i do want to cut a little fringe because it will suit you beautifully.. double gulp, uhm i haven't had one of those since std 6, but whatever you are the professional, just not too short please in a nervous voice off course, she snips and she clips and suddenly when she cuts the fringe it goes down in slooooowwwwwww moooottioon, noooooooooooooooo!! it's tooo short,it's tooo short! this woman takes the dryer, yip that's gonna make it grow back...she blows it with furious passion flicks it left , flicks it right and woala, "Kyk net hoe pragtag, sjoe dit lyk mooi...i could not look at myself in the mirror, either because of shock or concussion, because she dropped the front part of the dryer on my head when she was in the zone!! I tell her ever so politely that it's fine, i will see how it looks when she flat iron's and blow dries it...but nothing..i mean Nada.. zip , zero..get the picture? She sends me out with half dry hair curling up like a bad, bad, morning wake up perm..and a fringe that looks like a bad version of Jolandi Visser.. NOW WHAT??? i still have to walk out get milk and bread etc. and it's a busy mall AND i have a party on for tonight, clips is all i could think about. so i stand at pick and pay, hiding behind my wallet hoping no one i know sees me like this, because they will probably think that i have split up with my husband and gone on drugs or something,,yes that's how bad it looks! i pull at my hair at the bottom of my curls and guess what...bam on the counter a 6 cm piece of hair falls out probably about 1cm wide, like a badly done extension... i pick it up, dropped it in the bag, and sped out like a woman on nitro's!! I got home , clipped up hair, and my husband with a wth? expression... because normally when i get back.. i am relaxed, hair styled ( because after all it's part of your cut?) feeling great, but by this time, my eyes are blood shot, my face is pale and i am in a panic looking like a woman on a mental break down!! " not bad love he says.. Not Bad? Not Bad? i ripped out the first clip then the second...NOT BAD Hey? my voice shockingly SHRIEK..uhm he looks like a deer caught in the headlights..uhm maybe you should flat iron it, and see maybe she had a vision. a Vision.. I pulled out the lock of hair in the bag.. he Wants to burst a vain but you could see..he knows it would mean disaster..do not dare to laugh at a woman having a melt down lol! So Long story Short .. with some good wax and 2 hours of blow dry, flat iron and clips it started to look semi decent again...except for the fringe that is cut sooo short it will probably take 7 months to grow out! So what have i learned out of this experience? your hairdresser is like your life partner, they know your personality, your lifestyle, and your hair ( on it's good and bad days) and they know how to bring out the beauty in your locks..you just never ever ever  ever cheat on them..because you don't know what you have, how good they are until a Jolandi Visser crazed fan gets hold of a scissor and starts going clipper happy!

CELEBRITY ROLEMODELS TO OUR KIDS

Well, Celebrity role models, where do i begin? Does my child need one? Well i suppose that is a debatable topic, the fact is celebrities are there, in our faces, whether we want them to be our children's role models or not, they are.

What our kids wear, the latest trends in "slang" speech, What sort of moves they will pull on the dance floor, what they will aspire to become one day, their interests, their make - up, hair you name it, who do they look to for the latest trend? Definitely not always to us.
So Now that we have established that they are there, won't go away soon what can we as parents do about it?

You as a parent have to decide what is wholesome to you... and softly point your child in the right direction, you might as well become unpopular with your child from a young age, it's gonna happen when they hit 12 anyways...at least you know what you do know is going to play a big part on what type of adult they will be one day, because it does not matter how out of control they become as teenagers, they will always return to their values, they will always marry a woman that's like their mom or a man that is like their dads. FACT number 1.
My son is 8 years old, and by my influence he finds nothing inspiring about Lady Gaga. Good!! i Like that because I call her Tannie GA-GA because i do not find her to be wholesome at all, not for me or for my child anyways.

I use to  Hate Afrikaans music, did not buy Cd's, DVDs etc of Afrikaans music in general....and i am Afrikaans lol! But when your child is born somehow your diet becomes fish fingers, mash and peas and  you and your music taste fall out of the bus somewhere and i have been forced to listen to it, because he is an Afrikaans music Maniac!!

So i try to read as much as i can and Yolanda Barnard wrote a book Ponies Galop, Interesting behind the scenes look at celebrities and their "secrets" but nevertheless still a gossip book, but very factual,
Now I have always bought Steve Hofmeyr Cd's For my son, Laaities and Ladies etc But me being a Christian i realised with a big shock, shock horror ,horror that Mr Hofmeyer has a total disrespect for people in general, hate the media that he ever so politely used to get famous in the first place, Cheated on his wife soo many times and then blames the media for it, has a fowl mouth, attacks peoples character and mostly Thinks people who believe in God is Pathetic...well now, suppose i will be spending my money somewhere else from now on then..Personal opinion off course

Zander Tyler better known as Jack Parow, is part of the new ZEF phenomena in South Africa, and the fouler your mouth the Zeffer you are, Do yourself a favour and listen to the words of his songs, now he is not like that in his personal life, but in his celebrity persona he is ZEF at it's best along with Die Antwoord, Van Coke Kartel etc....
Now Don't get me wrong i have nothing against them, but an 8 year old can def. not think beyond what is reality and what not, so in their minds Jack Parow is Jack Parow, they do not see Mr. Zander Pelser with a fiance and a baby girl...and THAT is where we as parents come in..

We need to decide for ourselves what we want our kids to know and what not, when they are 16 they will decide for themselves anyways, but we have to in the mean time make those decisions of what TV programs and musicians they support and what is good for..

I look At Joe Niemand, Riana Nell , Nianell, Retief Burger, these are COOL people, with awesome tracks for kids to listen to, and google them to try and find anything Bad.....you won't find it, they are Awesome singers and even if you are not a Christian, they are still good role models, because they promote what is Good in this world, they promote humbleness, love, joy , peace, humanity, decency and these are good for any kids of any religion...

A well known radio station did an interview with Joe niemand the other day, and said that he pulled off a show with over 900 people on the set and that the quality of this production was one of the biggest in South Africa, and wanted to know how he felt about it, his instant , natural reaction to it was that it is not about himself , but About GOD, is that not awesome?

Elvis Blue is the humblest person i have seen in a while, his love for music, people, and God is amazing, Riana Nell told a story about how she found herself in London on a train and how she went through a dark time in her life , hopeless, depressed, sad, and there was a man on the train, she went on her knees, crying hopelessly...now we all know to be that desperate, you have to really be more than deep down a whole of sadness...but she looked up to the man and said " Sir do you know Jesus, because i need someone to pray for me right now, the man did not know Jesus and she told him Sir Do you not Know Jesus, He is the only one that can save us, he is our saviour , our king,  He died for us, and the man was in awe as she went on talking about God, WHOLESOME...Retief burger has Lived his entire life almost as an Evangelist for God, and at his shows he said take your eyes of off me and close them praise Our God....Nianell has the voice and personality of an Angel...

Now i am no professional but are these not the type of role models our kids need?
People who does not want to be put up on a pedestal and admired, they just want to get the world dancing for Jesus!!
We have to realise that the world is changing, people are changing the way people think, eat, drink, live it has all changed, the type of programs on TV changed, the ads in family slot has changed, The worst Horror movie in my time was Gremlins and i was not allowed to watch it, what is acceptable to day was banned 20 years ago, and my opinion is that the times changed because we are just surviving, we are not living anymore..we rush in the morning to work, we rush back home, we rush when we make food, it is as if we have become robotic slaves that just move forward when we are really only moving backwards..
We have so much influence on our young kids and what they like and how they treat others and we need to guide them to artist like Elvis, Joe and the rest, even if we don't like the music or whatever, you won't give your kids ice cream and chocolates for breakfast, yet we give them Ben 10 and lady Gaga as possible role models...

My son is not perfect, what 8 year old is?? but when he comes home after being bullied at school, and i got upset, and asked him why did you not hit back, he knocked me out with his answer...he told me that He is better than that, he is a child of God, and children of God respects each other and if you have respect you won't hurt others....WOW !!!! values that we teach our kids, we don't realise what a big influence our teachings have on our kids until; something happens that just knocks you out!


We Have fallen into this pit of darkness, we are raising a nation of children who start writing exams in st2, suffer from information overload at school, because someone need to pay taxes one day and keep our government alive....we have robbed our kids of what is rightfully theirs, we have robbed our kids of becoming the type of people our grandparents and parents are, we are robbing them of the magic of childhood without even realising it, we need to start living, forget about Cleaning the house for one day, who cares what your house looks like for one day?? don't do the beds, don't clean the rooms, forget about the dishes, eat hot dogs for supper,just for one day put yourself and your family first in your routine and see how awesome your day is...we need to to put back the magic in our children's eyes, we need to make 9 year old's believe in father Christmas, the Easter bunny, the tooth fairy, we need to buy our 11 year old girls dolls again, we just need to choose what this world needs and kill what it doesn't if a bad celebrity does not get support they won't survive in their industry, but we are the people supporting them by buying the Cd's, we make the choices to book concert tickets for celebrities that we don't like but your children does...we cannot sit back and say it is Jack Parrow, Or Steve Hofmeyer Or the Antwoord's fault that our nation is talking,dressing,acting and living through these celebrities... the FACT is they are not raising our kids WE are, they are simply taking the gap in society that we have created and supported up to now....Just a thought..just an opinion..but i hope that it makes a point of how important our decision of role models for our kids are...AND YES WE DO HAVE THE ABILITY TO MAKE OUR KIDS BELIEVE IN EITHER A BAD CELEBRITY OR A WHOLESOME CELEBRITY...IF WE COULD JUST TAKE BACK THE STEERING WHEEL AND START LIVING LIFE AND NOT JUST SURVIVING IT!!

HOLIDAY CRAFTS PART 3 - PLASTER OF PARIS!

Plaster of Paris Hearts


These crafts are super easy and super fun!

when mixing the plaster of paris for the hearts you use 2 cups of plaster of paris and 1 cup of cold water, start mixing you will see that the mixture starts of as watery and then starts to become thicker, once all the lumps are out, pour it into the silicone baking mould , leave it for about 5minutes to set alittle, then at the top place a skewer stick or someting like a pencil and let it stand for about 30 minutes or until it is dry. Carefully remove the pencil or skewer that you inserted in to the mould. Then turn the mould around and simply twist off the silicone mould! tada! paint it, the paint a coat of deco varnish or decoupage on it to seal it , rope through some ribbon and you are done!
These hearts are awesom to hang in your garden,in your childs room, or if you have an art wall in your house like i do you can add the new collection on there!

Variations:

You can place your child's hand in the plaster of paris mould, when it is staring to set, once it is dry, you have an awesome print of your childs hand in the heart mould, paint, seal and store in your memory box!












Your child can also do "mosaic"
You simply wait until the plaster of paris has set to a state where it is not runny anymore, but is still a little mushy for the beads to stick to it, just paste the beading to a sticky part of the heart and leave to dry,once it's dry pop it out of the silicone mould and DONE!



ENJOY!!

xx

School Holiday Crafts Part 2

Kids Crown

Crowns How-To

1. Tear off aluminum foil about 50 cm long. Fold in half twice, long sides together, or cuff; lay cuff with opening toward top.

Fold 50cm-wide tissue paper in half lengthwise twice; lay inside V of the cuff, folded edge up, so bottom edge is just below center of cuff.

2. Fold foil strip in half again, folding up from the bottom (this will hold the tissue in place).

3. Cut flat-topped points in tissue paper, leaving attached at the fold, and decorate with stickers.

4. Overlap ends to proper size, and slip one end of foil inside the other. Tape or glue together.




and TADA!!!

Use pinks and purples, and if you have any of these little stick on jewelery you can add those on there for your little princess!!

Want to get your little one's to start saving some money? Well let them make their own little money bank!!

Money Pig



This little piggy (bank) started off at the market as a 2ltr fair cape milk bottle. To make one, rinse an empty bottle with hot soapy water; let dry. Cut features such as eyes, ears, and nostrils from cardboard/scrapbook or normal painted or coloured in paper (ears should have tabs). Attach with double-sided tape, or glue as shown in the picture. Tape patterned paper around body.   empty bottle caps (coke,fanta etc) on for legs. Cut a slot at the top for coins, and a hole in back to insert a pipe-cleaner tail.

Tada!

Enjoy

xxx

School Holiday Crafts Part 1

Build Noah's Ark

What You will need:

• Paper plate
• Two sheets of brown construction paper
• Scissors
• Glue
• Cotton balls

Instructions

1. Place the two pieces of construction paper in a stack
2. Draw a house shape on the top sheet (rectangle for a body and a triangle for a roof).
3. Cut out the house shape, making sure to cut through both pieces of construction paper simultaneously
4. Glue cotton balls on the back of one sheet of the construction paper shapes to give it bulk
5. Glue the two pieces of paper together at the edges. This will make the ark appear full.
6. Fold the plate in half, creasing it tightly
7. Cut a slit in the fold in the plate that is wide enough for the house to slip into
8. Slide the house into the ark's base until only a small piece of the rectangular piece is visible above the plate
9. Stuff more cotton balls into the plate
10. Glue the plate shut along its curved edges
11. Paint the plate brown to match the house shape and to complete the ark.

SURVIVING SCHOOL HOLIDAYS 101

Wow!! i cannot Believe that the school holidays are starting in 2 days, for some moms this is something to look forward to, for some moms it is daunting, because we all know keeping our kids busy in the winter comes with a whole lot of challenges not to mention headache tablets and hairgrowth treatments!i know i am one of those moms who by the end of the holiday have almost no hair left and the ones that has'nt been pulled out are in need of colouring because they were left completely grey!!

So to keep the kids happy and the mommy's sane i have decided to for the next 4 or 5 days post ideas for things to keep the little one's busy!

Today i will start of with a few basic diy recipes for a few things that we can use and later on today i will start posting photos and ideas of what crafty things you could do this holiday!

Fingerpaint

1/2 cup cornstarch
3 Tbsp. sugar
1/2 tsp. salt
2 cups cold water
food coloring

Instructions

In a medium pan, mix all the ingredients together to make the finger paint. Cook over low heat 10 to 15 minutes. Keep stirring the finger paint mixture until it is smooth and thick. After the finger paint has thickened take the pan off the stove and let the mixture cool.

After cooling, divide the finger paint into storage containers depending on how many colors you would like. Add a few drops of food coloring to each container. Stir the coloring in to the paint to determine the shade of color. You're ready to finger paint! Cover tightly when storing.

Now For some Glue!!













In a saucepan mix 1 cup of flour with 1/3 cup of sugar.
Add half of the water required and mix into a thick paste without clumps.
Pour in the rest of the water and combine till the paste is smooth.
Pour a teaspoon of vinegar and put on medium heat until the mixture starts to thicken.
Cool and transfer to jar or an airtight plastic container.
This glue will keep for a few days. Refrigerate to prolong the shelf life (the jar in my fridge is 6 months old).
Vinegar in this glue recipe acts as a mild natural preservative. You might use grapefruit seed extract or tee tree oil (5-10 drops) instead of vinegar to naturally preserve the glue. Stick with vinegar though if you have small kids – not only is this glue non toxic, but perfectly edible too!
This glue needs more time to dry, but when dried, the bond is really strong.

PLAY DOUGH



Ingredients
2 cups flour
2 cups warm water
1 cup salt
2 Tablespoons  oil
1 Tablespoon cream of tartar

food coloring
Mix all of the ingredients together, and stir over low heat. The dough will begin to thicken until it resembles mashed potatoes.

When the dough pulls away from the sides and clumps in the center, remove the pan from heat and allow the dough to cool enough to handle.

IMPORTANT NOTE: if your playdough is still sticky, you simply need to cook it longer!
Keep stirring and cooking until the dough is dry and feels like playdough.

Turn the dough out onto a clean counter or silicone mat, and knead vigorously until it becomes silky-smooth. Divide the dough into balls for coloring.

Make a divot in the center of the ball, and drop some food coloring¹ in. Fold the dough over, working the food color through the body of the playdough, trying to keep the colouring away from your hands  You could use gloves or plastic wrap at this stage to keep your hands clean- only the concentrated colouring will color your skin, so as soon as it's worked in bare hands are fine.

Work the colouring through, adding more as necessary to achieve your chosen color.
Play with your playdough- I really don't need to help you there. It's entirely edible, if a bit salty, so it's kid-safe.

When you're done, store your playdough in an air-tight container.
- If it begins to dry out, you can knead a bit of water in again to soften the dough back to useability. Once it's dried past a certain point, however, you'll just have to start over; thankfully it's not terribly difficult.
- If it gets soggy, you can re-heat it to drive off the extra water the dough absorbed overnight. This is usually the result of high humidity, but is fixable!

You can also bake it in the oven to make hard dough figures and ornaments, then paint or otherwise decorate the surface.
Till next time
xx

KID'S PARTIES ON A BUDGET!

oki doki, so for a while now, i have been reading on other people's pages about what to do when you have a big heart but a small wallet...and then i just got a bucket full of ideas chucked straight at me this morning! So this one is for all the mom's with kiddies who would like to throw a million buck splash for a R1000 !! Enjoy!

Okay so first things first Theme!

Choose a theme that won't break the bank, if your baby is turning one, this will be easy, as they cannot voice their opinion as strong as a ben 10 crazy 6 year old lol!

then decide on the colour, normally pastels are always a winner with little one's, now if you could find a R5 store in your town, and i think most of you can, go on and buy the small paper plates they are about R14, in a plain colour, then place a themed serviete on top of it and place the " party pack " on top of that!
In the middle of the table you place one bowl of cheese curls, an empty coffee tin with a coloured ribbon tied in a bow, in the coffee tin you place marshmallows on a stick, marie biscuits with a half a marshmallow melted inbetween with decorated icing on top can also be placed in a plate, you can also put mini pizza slices on a plate for the kids party table and then you can make cupcakes and tower that on the table as well, this is MORE than enough!.

Inside the party bag you put 1 packet of cheese curls, 1 oros bottle juice, 1 marshmallow string, and a packet of jelly babies or you can just have a "thank you table with sweets in bowls and the mom can choose a few "goodbey" treats to take home.

all along the middle between the bowls with treats you place more decorated tins and inside of them you put balloon stick with balloons on them just to brighten up the table!
If you do not have table cloths in reds or blues or pinks or even whites, use a single bed sheet:-)

streamers are a mess to clean up and you can never really reuse them, so buy cheap ribbon and hang balloons from them:-)

you can make an activity table with colouring pictures and crayons, another table with clay and another with puzzles! these are things that i think most kids already have so you don't need to go buy it!

If you choose to have  the party bag you can do the following:
* Get brown paperbags and decorate them with a single picture of your theme and with a Permanent marker write each kids name on it

* go to spar and ask them if they can sell you 10 of their little cake boxes and decorate it when you   
   get home.

* Go to the R5 store and if you can get small gift bags, get those and place the thingies in there!


For the adults it is Very easy if you feel you HAVE to cater to the adults bake a chocolate cake for dessert, and serve hotdogs or hamburgers that you make yourself! It's not about the parent but the kids, i had 8 years to learn that the adults are normally the expensive part of a party and therefore i let them know that there won't be a big buffet for them!

And last but not least Use the internet for ideas, just because ideas look expensive it doen't mean it has to be, most of the things you see on the party ideas websites can be made by yourself!

here's a few pic's to help you with ideas!

Happy planning, happy party'ing and enjoy!

Till next time xx

p

the life of a secretbloggingmom

the life of a secretbloggingmom

So After almost a month of very bad bronchitis and a good dose of self pity i am back to finish what i started :-)

Today i just want to do a quick reality check post, while i was sick this month or so, i realised how much i actually do have to be thankful for, yet when we go through our everyday routines those blessings seem so far away and it isn't that difficult to forget how much we have, i read something the other day and it hit me in the face like a 3 ton brick i would like to share it with you and hopefully it would have the same effect on anyone who like myself, tend to go through a phase where gratefulness sometimes go on the back burner.

" What if you woke up tomorrow, and all you had left was what you thanked the Lord for Last Night"

WOW, powerful words, and yet so very very true, don't you think?

We live in a time where if  a mom  has the gift of giving her hungry child a warm plate of food, she is blessed.

I mean we see so many times on TV mom's that looks like life has given them a beating, it looks as if they themselves have not had anything to eat in days, images of a mom holding on to her starving baby giving them the only comfort that a mom with no food,money or ability to care for her child can. It is easy for us to point a finger and judge, it is easy for us to say if you can't afford a child then don't have one, but we do not have any idea of the situations in other areas of the world, other believes, other ways of doing things around the world.

We live in a country where we as mothers have rights. we have the right to work, we have the right to be loved by one man only if we choose to do so, there are countries in the world were children of 12 become mothers and wives and it is acceptable?

Blessed is a mother that can tuck her child in with a warm blanket, protected from the cold, harsh elements that is held within cold dark winter's  night. because we see so many mothers in countries where disasters struck, tsunami's , hurricanes and although donations are made world wide, these mothers has to somehow keep their children warm until those donations arrive.

Blessed is a mother that has the joy of holding her child in her arms, protecting, loving, reading stories, spending time, laughing, cuddling LOVING that bundle of joy, because there's mom's that has to say goodbye to a baby that has never had the chance to be held, loved or kissed before passing away, there are mothers that has to say goodbye to a child that she had so many dreams for, so many plans for, yet we have the privilege of saying goodnight to our kids.

Blessed is a mother who knows exactly where her kids are today, there are so many mothers who's children has been kidnapped,murdered,sold as child prostitutes and the eternal search of a mother for her child will never fade, they will always wonder with absolute fear where is my child, is she/he hungry, cold, alive?

Blessed is a woman, who has a husband that Love's her, cares for her, looks after the household financially the best he can, because somewhere tonight is a woman who is being raped,battered, emotionally abused and treated as possession with no rights and she has no where to go, no one to turn to.

My point with this whole blog is not to upset anyone, but to make just 1 person realise what i realised, that life is short, it's a blessing, it comes with ups and downs, but at the end of all trials and tribulations your family and kids are what pulls us through gives us purpose, keeps us alive, what a privilege it is!

From today i will hug my child 3 seconds longer, say i love you 2 times more, protect him 4 times harder and appreciate him infinity time infinity and back!

xx

7 Day lunchbox ideas!

Okay so we all know that the dreaded lunchbox dilemma give's us an extre few grey hair, it just upsets us terribly when that lunchbox comes back and that little sucker aint empty!
So what to do what to do? well how bout mixing it up every week?
I will be sharing with you each week for the next 4 weeks a little menu that you can try out, just to make those grey hair appear a little slooower!
Here Goes!
Week 1:

Monday:
mini pita filled with bacon & cheese
A fruit kebab with pear,melon and strawberry
Mini cheddar biscuits with a melrose cheese block
Marie biscuit with a melted marshmallow centre ( because we all need a little something sweet!)
Manny's melon juice

Tuesday:
French toast with honey and cheese
Handfull of dried mango, raisens and cocnut
Little cheese and vienna toothpicks
muffin
Carin cranberry juice

Wenesday:

mini cheeseburger ( woolies)
mini cheddars with kirri cheese
banana kebab with the tip dipped in chocolate
2 x dinasour eggs Boil eggs, place in a bowl of coloured water leave for 5 minutes break off the shell and ta da!
yoghurt
gilbert's grape juice

Thursday:
mini pancake filled with favourite filling
apple with a little bit of honey and cinamon
mini cheddar with cheese
yoghurt
2 pieces of mini nougats
Peter Pear Juice

Friday Pieday:-)

homemade mini chicken pie
cucumber and cheese toothpicks
handfull of dried fruit
yoghurt
mini marshmallows
Annie Apple Juice

If you don't have a juicer, moms get one! i don't know how i survived so long without one! absolutely awesome and money well spent!
with half a sweet melon you can make the most awesome juice for school, add a bit of crushed ice, and yummy all the way!
the same with the rest of the juices just add them in the juicer and whhhhhaaalaaa no easier way to get that fruit in!

That's all for now folks until next time!
xxx

NATURAL BIRTH VS C-SECTION

Today i am writing about a subject more serious, It's about c-sections, natural birth and the judgement and labels that goes with it.
i am a c-section mommy and if i could i would go the natural way BUT childbirth in general has it's risks whether you go c-section or natural , now the reason for my sudden upset is because i was reading a fb discussion about a mom asking a question about whether she should go c or labour after the doctor advised her to rather have a c-section, my opinion was that she should use the advise of her doctor and this was trashed by the moms that went the natural route saying that it is a cop out, now this post and the opinions are directed directly to these types of moms...Now trust me c-section is no cop out at all, and the pains that goes with childbirth is there no matter what route you go..
the fact is if you want to do finger pointing and accuse moms that has c-sections of being bad moms and selfish for not thinking of the effects of anaesthetic to the baby you might want to read these 

STUDIED FACTS about epidurals:

• They may increase the risk of cesarean section by 2.5 times.
• They triple the occurrence of induction with synthetic oxytocin (Pitocin).
• They quadruple the chances a baby will be persistently posterior (POP, face up) in the final stages of labour, which in turn decreases the chances of spontaneous vaginal birth
• They decrease the chances of spontaneous vaginal delivery. In 6 of 9 studies reviewed in one analysis, less than half of women who received an epidural had a spontaneous vaginal delivery.
• They increase the risk of pelvic floor problems (urinary, anal and sexual disorders) in mothers after birth, which rarely resolve spontaneously.

One important thing to note about these studies: in most of them, the women in the “control” groups were given opiate painkillers, which are also known to disrupt the natural hormonal processes of birth. We can assume, then, that a comparison of women using no drugs during labour would have revealed even more substantial differences.

Now i can go on and copy and paste of the Internet thousands of side - effects of births and epidurals etc. i can forever go on about the risk factors, but that is not my point so do yourself a favour and go have a good read about all the risks of childbirths...it will scare anyone out of having a child at all..

Now, it was mentioned by one of these "perfect" moms that she had 3 water births at home , only picked up 12 kg, jumped back to her pre-pregnancy weight in a month and she ate candy floss and pooped rainbows happily ever after..and that doctors are the enemies who forces down c-sections on innocent moms and that she should not listen to her doctor.. now i have this to say about that comment, if you are becoming a mom you should not be an innocent being not being able to question when needed and go for second opinions if you are unsure, you should perhaps also be sure that you choose a doctor that you respect and trust, because what is the point of having one then, i you will not listen or trust your doctor's OPINION ( because that is what it is) then maybe you should rather buy a GP degree on line and manage the birth yourself? ha how'z that for a good idea?

My point is i have friends who went through normal births who are extremely happy and content with that and when they mention it, it is not with judgement, i have had a friend who went the vaginal way with an epidural  and so on , the FACT is any mom knows her changing body, they know what they are capable of, they have the Internet and blogs to their disposal we are living in a time where all of these info are readily available to us all to help us make informed choices and judging each other by the choices we make is pointless, it serves no positive building up purposes, it has absolutely no good reason to be done, no judging ever has, so why not be a good friend and person and keep judgements to one self?
Why is there this pressure to not tell the truth about childbirth experiences the good and the bad, why is it normal to scare the living goodness out of a first time mom by saying things that is upsetting? why is it normal in today's time to sit in a conversation and make each other feel bad about the decisions we make for our unborn babies? and why is it acceptable for us to sit there and witness it?
 not having the birth that is socially acceptable does not make you a bad person or a bad mom it makes you normal, and it makes you ,you So unless your child is being abused, starved, broken, and beaten, not getting love, not taught to love and respect,  you are a good mom, and that's it,  that's all there is to it, just like there is no manual on parenthood , there is also no manual on making the right choices for you, there is guidelines and opinions and it should be treated that way..
MY OPINION:
it does not matter how your child comes into this world, it is about how he leaves it, and being a good mom is teaching your child the Good in this world, about morals,  love, hurt,  being strong, about being true, about dignity, about respect, about Loving life , appreciating it, about living it, so that the day your golden thread is clipped you can go out KNOWING that your child is the good of this world and t that would be the way he will be leaving it too....

xx

the life of a secretbloggingmom: Me VS supermom and the world!

the life of a secretbloggingmom: Me VS supermom and the world!

Me VS supermom and the world!

Okay so here i am baking cupcakes at 01:14 in the morning, decorating, baking making it look all pretty, all 90 of them!! school bake sale, entrepeneurs day you might ask? ( because if you are a mom then these are perfect excuses right?) WELL i am baking them for no apparent reason, giving them to the church kids, packing extra-ordinary lunches for tommorow, ironing the clothes for work,school,karate and then clothes for after karate, prepping for tommorow's breakfast, signing of homework books, checking homework etc...if youre a mom...then you'll get where i am coming from right..because i am trying my butt of to be supermom , over compensating and feeling extra bad when my sense of humour or patience runs dry!
 in one second i can go from angelic temptress and lover to a black widow, a sugary sweet mommy to a dracula ready to ...well you get what i mean!  so why do we put so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect?And most of all why is it socially unacceptable to admit that you're not? and what exactly is perfect and to who's standards?

Well as you very well know..i love writing about my life's experiences so here goes..the day i found out i was supermom...!

We all have these competative thorns in our sides..the dreaded perfect mom at school...she's perfect at baking, needlework, art projects for school, and just about everything else, she is  one of the class representatives at school, she helps on sport days and any other event happening, she has the perfect husband, perfect daughter and perfect little boy..they have perfect family holidays and off course all of this while she still holds down a perfect full time job!!!
So here i was this one monday morning dropping of my Dash Light year at school and here walks mrs perfect, for all records let's call her Villan X, ( i like the ring to that VILLAN X lol)!
You know when someone just knows how to push them buttons...

It all started the monday morning..for some reason i just did not hear the alarm, and disaster managemnet 1 for the week struck!
It's 07:00 i have a child with adhd and suddenly getting it all done in 30 minutes looks like... well....you know!
So here follows a brief description of how the week went!
Monday over slept, fell when i came in the kitchen, (think i will need a hip replacement, but i'll live)got up in record speed and stuuupid looked if someone saw me...wth?
almost grabbed the cupboard door off it's hinges while getting the cereal box ( as if this is going to spare me some time?)
Chuck in milk go down the passage make a u turn forgot the honey, add honey start powerwalk down the passage, sigh of relief, D is awake...just spared 3 minutes!!!
Lady time is on my side this morning because he is starving and races through his cereal....
aaaah start dressing him, he gets irritated by this gesture and demands on doing it himself...stop arguing and start delegating!!
School starts at 07:45 it is now 07:40 thank heavens we live so close and he dashes into the gates like dash from the incredibles and makes it in a nick of time!!!phew!!!No detention slip today YEAH!

Tuesday...

This is really begining to pull at my patience because once again i did not hear the alarm!!!!!!!!

Same Routine as yesterday with a little more drama off course but, once again my little booba dashes through the school gates this time like Mr Buzz light year himself!!!
Much to Villan X's Ammusement, and just there it feels like someone just threw me with an ice cold bucket of in your face!!!i have no make-up on, my green pick'npay slippers boots ( wich by the way is much warmer than those nine west..uhm i mean nine inch heels!) (and i can run faster!) standing out like a neon sign under my track pants and jersey!! and yes you guessed it, she looks as if she just stepped out of a magazine...who looks like that this time of the am?
THAT IS IT!!! I will wake up on time tommrow..make b/fast,have clothes ready...I am going to be SUPERMOM!!!!!
wednesday..
04:30 how the hec did i hear the alarm this morning? but i get up , make breakfast, bacon, toast,eggs,danish,juice,coffee,tea the works!
Wake up my little superdude, get him into a tracksuit and those takkies and we are goign for a walk!!
he's excited, we enjoy the walk, but i need my fix..i'll do anything for the fix..you know what i am talking about, we all need one,wheter it's decaf or caff we can't survive without it..and i need a hardcore shot of espresso (or 2), so we make the walk a bit fatser so that we can get home, go through the morning perfect, drop little superdude off at school, even before  VILLAN X and her little Pozzie arrives at school!
Thursday Repeated as Wednesday!
And friday meets me with a smile......not really.. but i grab the rest of my body out of bed, and drag myself to the kitchen..feels like a train or 6 of them chanllenged me and i lost!
but here we go same as wednesday and thursday...
Now you can just imagine this laid back, chilled out family, who does weird things, who's always late, and seemingly always  relaxed but also a bit crazy ...one day i might reveal my identity and treat you with a clip of saturday night fun....i am sure i will cause somone somewhere much laughter for many years to come!! but anyways i am drifting off again..the point is we should actually be living next to the coast cause we are just chill like that!
The weekend came..and so did the 100's of biscuits etc. i baked, my superdude felt like a decorated bicuit by the end of the weekend.and i could tell that this perfect little family of mine is on the edge...and then Sunday evening the bomb bursts!!!!!

My alarm clock is gone.....i can't find superdude's lunchbox, i forgot to buy yoghurt and the coffee is finished... and then my hubby (as if this is normal) ag but you can just quickly pop in at the shop tommorow like you always do when you forget something......
WHAT???
and then, superdude says very cautiously...and mommy can i sleep a little later tommorow, because i am reallly tired...and hubby says and can i please just have cereal in the morning because all this eating is making me feel ill, and superdude just have to slip in there with a " i think it's better for mommy too, because your hip needs to rest( HE SAW ME) humiliation just swallowed me in...supermom without wings!  HA so jumping up and looking if anyone saw me isn't as dumb as i thought!!
Ungratefull suckers!
No we just like you the way you are, yes mommy i have the coolest mom in the world, and now you you are like a crazy robot Mom!
Aww really?  My husbands reply" Yes babe, i love you the way you are, unorganised but always getting it done, we like how you roll" and superdude says " YES You are my Supermom!!"

SUPERMOM...ME...SUPERMOM? i am tearing up here.....

Now there you have it! Nothing was wrong but i tried to fix it! Every Family has it's own way of making things work..sometimes it goes smooth and sometimes...well sometimes you almost break a hip because of an alarm clock malfunction... but All families has hiccups wheter you do it woman alone or Like Villan X with 2 nanny's and a butler's helping you out with the morning routines..but don't change the way you manage your household...because your man married you and is inlove with you because you and your ways are what he fell in love with,( Men are not nearly as stupid as we think...when they are younger they hang with all the little floozies,party with the partychicks, go after the skinny,sexy,model types Drink till they pass out but as they mature,( and i have to warn you a few of them never matures!) But those who do, they start to look at THEIR WIVES and the woman they choose are ladies with different standards and suddenly the wife material they are looking for gets chosen with different criteria's, someone they can love forever, who can bare their children, who can manage their households,who can plan the family vacations that they work so hard to provide, rolemodels that their kids can look up to and a woman that's gonna have his back as much as he will have hers! and that's how we became the good wife's and mom's that we are)  we were chosen of the A list! And your kids , your adoarable, sometimes driving mom up the walls -kids, just adore you no matter how crazy you are, how angry you get, how much or how little you give, how imperfect or perfect you are! We are their SUPERMOMS and SUPERWIVES even if we sometime's feel the need to compare ourselves to other's who seemingly has such a perfect Life,  sometimes.just sometimes the grass is not greener on the other side...

So don't ever second guess yourself You are a super in your own right and those who matter don't care and those who cares don't matter!

xxx

THE CONTROVERSIAL TOPIC OF ADHD

Okay so here goes, today i will be brushing on the topic of ADHD, phew where do i start?
Let me start by taking you on the road that we have been walking for the past 3 years!
Our little boy was born on the 02 January 2004, i had a healthy pregnancy, and a healthy baby, at 2 month's he was sleeping right through the night and as a one year old he was giving us all the joy a baby could give it's new parents!

He has always been a busy little boy, always on the go, always a laugh a minute ( and still is)!
At 5 we sent him to his 1st year in grade R, we decided to send him a year early so that the first year could be more of an experience to get him ready for his actual Grade R year, he had fun, like a 5 year old does, but at our first teacher-parent meeting his teacher at the time told us that we need to put him on meds...shock shock horror horror! i was furious! we refused the meds and told them that all the "problems" thay have with our son like for example, not sitting still, always talking to much, being to busy in class etc. are not ADHD problems but normal 5year old behaviour..i told the teacher that if in his second year we encounter issues, that we would handle it then.. and that was that!
His second year now age 6 was the same old issues, not sitting still, etc. We had our son tested and he was tested positive with a very high spectrum of ADHD..not the end of the world right? we did the diet route, the homeopathic route, all the alternative routes, because i was one of the first mothers to say i will never put my child on meds! but what do you do, when your child comes home everyday negative, unhappy, thinking that everyone hates him, when the teacher say's he is going to fail his grade? You tend to change your whole way of thinking hey?

So what do you do when nothing else seems to work? do you get sad and wonder why sally's child responds well to diet and home remdies and yours doesn't? NO you pull yourself towards yourself and you deal with the issue at hand, because that little bundle of joy you gave birth to now needs your serious attention!
we started with the ritalin, and school work improved...A whole lot as in day and night difference!..but he lost weight and that firy busy wacky child just dissapeared, and it killed us, so we took him off and tried a few other meds but also with the same effect on his personality the year came and went with teacher and mom not being able to really find a way to tollerate eachother but he passed all the way through to grade 1..We then went the Concerta way, and we are still on it and with possitive results. Grade 1 was a light breeze a few hicckups here and there but we went through it and ended it on a possitive note, he is now in Grade 2 and he is still doing good at school, but still with hicckups here and there between teacher and mom, but he will be getting through the year just fine, because he is a clever kid!

So why all the hiccups then? Well simply because there are tachers..and then the are teachers, you get teachers that are such sweethearts, who embraces their profession, who does it for the love and will just grow more and more patience over their years, and then you get teachers who somewhere aling the way forgot why they became teachers in the first place...i know of the latter, who has no patience, who is constantly giving detention marks, who likes to scream and shout in class, and when you send a book about how to deal with kids with adhd they simply aren't interested in reading it because " I know what ADHD is"....

So where does it leave this topic?
It is only the start of this topic lol!

i have now shared with you just briefly without going into too deeply our experience so far..
the point of this topic now shifts over to society and their views on meds and ADHD.

My personal experience with this is the following, you will be judged for your decision - That is a FACT and how you will be dealing with this will be up to you!

What most people do not understand about parents with ADHD children is that you resent yourself so much when you hear your child has this "dissease", your world falls appart and you start asking yourself what did you do wrong, you struggle because you need to make decisions for your child that will be judged badly by the rest of the world...out off a lack of understanding!
The world sees this healthy child, who acts impulsively,does without thinking, comes accross as being so unobedient, and they label your child as naughty and you as a bad parent,
So now you get 2 types of Public Judges:
The ag Shame Judges
"Ag shame did you see harry and sally with their boy? It must be so terrible for that family to live with the dissease that their child has...They will forever have problems at school and in their social circles with their son you know, Ag shame you know they don't even get invited to kid's parties anymore, because their child is so Hyper, i feel so sorry for them!"

A HA - and then you get the i can't believe it Judges!

The i can't believe it judges
" I can't believe they put their child on meds, you know it is such an easy way out, he just needs a good hiding, there is no such thing as ADHD, i can't believe that now a days if a child does not have manners he get's diagnosed with ADHD!

Now i have learned to live with both and if you are a mom with and ADHD child reading this, i will suggest you do the same or else you will drive yourself crazy with resentment!
It's very easy, your child is not mentally handicapped and ADHD is not a Disease!
your child is just different, he has a different way of seeing the world, and you as a parent need to embrace it and live it through your child's eyes and you will be amazed at what a tecnicoloured rainbow life you can be living!
Forget about what people are saying, because every second you think and resent yourself about what they are thinking you are losing a second of your life, a second you wont get back, a second that turns into minutes that turns into hours, hours that you could have rather spent baking biscuits, making mudpies or just chilling infront of the tv with your child, don't think long term that your child will be on meds for the rest of their lives, instead equip your child in his growing years with the tools he needs to cope, to remember the simple things, so that when he gets older it would be easier to possibly take him of meds, because he has then grown the tools he needs to be socialy acceptable!
our kids are not villans, we are not bad parents and the world can judge all they want, they can read a few articles on what adhd is and then think they know it all BUT until you do not have a child that goes through these things, keep your opinions to yourself.
Until you have not gone through the routines at home with an ADHD child, until you have not reminded your child to brush his teeth in the mornings, until you have not reminded your child to leave the bed and redirected him back to the bathroom to go brush his teeth like you asked 10minutes ago before he wandered off on the way to the bathroom to do something else again until this has not become yor way of living don't judge, because for each finger you point to others three fingers are pointing back.

If your child has asthma, and by giving your child an asthma pump, you can equip him with the ability to do sports, run around like a child, and have a good quality of life, do you want to tell me that you as a parent will deny your child this right?
Well the same could be said for parents who has children with ADHD!
I love my son, i am younger at heart than most 33 year olds, he keeps me on my toes, he keeps me creative, he keeps me grounded, he keeps me sane in an unsane world, he keeps me possitive in a negative society , he keeps my inner child alive, and without our inner child still alive how can we still truly be living life at all?

The point of this disscusion?

Med's or no Med's it remains the decision and right of the parent of this child and should not be open to condemnation,discussion or judgement of anyone else
This is just my opinion.
xxx

AND SO IT BEGINS!

And so my secret blogging life begins, why secret you ask? Well Probably because i shy away from attention..normally if you look for me i won't be the one dancing on the tables and being at the centre of a heated debate (if you know what i mean). But secretly inside my deepest of deep i am a *Diva*, i looove girly things, i love baking, i love making things, i love making my friends and family happy, and most of all i adore being a wife and absolutely thrive on being a mom,BUT and don't get me wrong, there has to be more...i am quickly approaching 33 and as i sit and look back at my life i can't help feeling a little..well...underweight in the achievement department!
I also have besides all of the above , so many business ideas, Dreams, opinions, i want to debate on things that gets people red under the collar, i want to say what everyones thinking, i want to help people i don't know by sharing my life's experiences, i want to be famous(don't we all lol), i want to be random, unpredictable..and i want to learn how to be a writer, maybe write a book one day, but for some reason i have never been able to 1. Speak or voice my opinions in public, and by public i really do mean any group of 6 people or more. 2. I really do not have much  selfconfidence, wich in turn i think emotionally probably cripples me a bit when i make decisions, and lastly 3. I don't like Surprises. Yip that's me Mrs. control!lol!
So with this blog i will try not to cater for one specific group of people, i hope to reach a wide spectrum of different people going through life, looking for a light read, for some humour, for some controversial opinions and to just see that life is..well what we make of it, wheter we do it by name or like me with a secretmask on!

Join me on my ventures, some will be boring, some will just be random, i will share my joy's, my tears, i will share my thoughts, frustrations,favourite recipes, ideas etc.
Join in, comment,share and who know's where this magical road might take us!!

xxx